


Harry and Draco, sitting in a tree, F-I-G-H-T-I-N-G

by BecomeTheFairytale



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Crack Fic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-09-17 08:51:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16971546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BecomeTheFairytale/pseuds/BecomeTheFairytale
Summary: Just crackfic





	Harry and Draco, sitting in a tree, F-I-G-H-T-I-N-G

The Hogwarts corridor crackles with the electric mix of anger and sexual tension. Literal lightning bolts shoot up from the spaces between the paving stones and bounce off the walls.

Harry and Draco face off, Harry with the eyes that are literal emeralds, Draco's sneer looking like it could cut glass.

"Narcissa is a ho!" Harry shouts.

"Lily is a ho!" Draco rejoins.

At that, Harry's face crumples in confusion. "But...but Draco, my mother died 15 years, 1 month, and 12 days ago. How could you know that? You've never met her!"

Draco frowns thoughtfully. "Potter, for once in your life you have made an astute observation. Hereafter I will consign myself to realistic insults." There's a pause. Smol lightning bolts zig-zag across the floor. "Molly is a ho!" shouts the ice prince of Slytherin House.

At Malfoy's acknowledgment of how much his surrogate mother means to him, Harry's eyes flare with heat. The ground between them bursts into flame. They move together as one, hands reaching for each other's hair and mouths crashing together. The castle purrs in satisfaction, and curls into a ball to go to sleep.


End file.
